“I’d love to know what goes on in your head” They said.
“It’ll be a good read” They said.
And so here I am. Sitting at my boyfriend Pauls mac writing my first entry for my shiny new blog. I can’t lie, until I met Paul 3.5 years ago, I didnt even know how to turn on a computer, now I’m a literally a wizard at online shopping (that includes shopping out of my means and hiding the parcels, but that’s another blog entry.) Just because I’m typing, doesn’t mean a have a clue what I’m doing, I’ve already text him and told him he will have to come and sort the mess out for me when he finishes work – the joys of being head over heels in love and lust with a hugely talented graphic designer. *Insert imaginary heart emoji here*. I’m not sure what I’m expecting from this blog, I definitely know I’m not one of those who is doing it in the hope of stacks of freebies (although I’d never say no to a lifetime supply of party rings), I’m just one of those women who likes to write, laugh at myself and share my opinions with anyone who will allow it – I think my days of working in Healthcare are almost over, I need to be on The Loose Women panel.
My first post is probably going to be a bit longer than the rest, simply because I want to explain myself a little and I appreciate there’s not a hope in hell that I can do it in a ridiculously small amount of words, all hail those students who have to write to target..teach me, I beg of you!
So, who am I and how did I get here? The most obvious and sarcastic answer would be, “Well I’m Emma and I fell out of my Mothers front bum 33 years ago duh”. But instead, I will keep it tight and not focus on wizards sleeves. Yet. (That reminds me, must eventually write a post about pelvic floor failure and trampolines).
So yes, I’m Emma. 13 years ago I became a Mother to the most gorgeous, yellow, hairy doll like baby I have ever seen. She is that walking, talking cliche, the best thing that ever happened to me, I want to say she was the making of me, I guess in most ways she was, but in other ways I screwed up royally and it’s taken a while to get to being “Me”. More about that another time. It’s pretty common knowledge to those that know me well enough, Beth is the only child I have ever been lucky enough to give birth to and thanks to my incredible surgeon who carved out my womb (I bet he’s useful at Hallowe’en) she is the only child I will ever give birth to again. However, all is not lost. Enter Paul and his two little people George and Lyla. Paul came into my life before my stitches had even healed and turned my world completely on its head. Like a tornado had hit it, my family of two became a little gang of five and thats’s what we are. A real small gang made up of hyperactive, loud and messy chaos, and that’s just me, I shit you not.
This blog is going to fill you in on all the goings on at Number 59. There’ll be tears, tantrums, hormonal outbursts (no womb = menopause for me), I can’t do this versus I’ve got this shit nailed days, my current quest to the perfect Charlize Theron smile (yes, I’m the girl with brocolli in her braces), things that float my boat and things that grip my shit. And then they’ll be the comedy moments. The Classic Emmas.
Stick with me, please.
**imaginary heart emoji**